House Party is a roller coaster of frustration, bugs, and boobs…. I played it, and have a lot to say about it. You’ve been warned.

Party on!

When you arrive at the party you’re prompted to find your buddy Derek. Derek seems like an all around, Super Nice Guy™. He encourages you to introduce yourself to people at have a good time, so you start wandering around the party making conversation… And that conversation is either a shitty pickup line for the girls or a “hey bro” to the guys. Each character has their own quirk and it is pretty obvious from the start that your goal is to get some virtual v by the end of the night.

How does one virtually score? Easy! Do stupid tasks for her like find stuff to do whip-its, or set up super mean pranks. There are a ton of tasks that you have to accomplish like sneaking booze to people while avoiding Stereotypical Straightedge Guy™, or hiding in a closet to watch a girl masturbate… One thing I thought I’d never see in a game, yet here we are.

Bugs ‘n More

If you like clicking ten times to pick up one item, you’ll love this game! I spent way too much time trying to line up my cursor perfectly with items, in order to put them in my inventory. You also can’t review certain lines of text that were very obviously needed later on. For example, you have to combine items to get a safe code. That involves getting a pencil rubbing of said code. I knew I’d have that paper back in my inventory so I didn’t bother to write the code down… Man, was that a mistake. When you inspect that same piece of paper (that now looks used) you can’t retrieve the code.

I also had a problem with the design of the players. Frank, as pictured above, spoke with an open mouth and full teeth on occasion. It was like he was baring his teeth at you. That, coupled with his deadpan look, was kind of terrifying. While most of the characters looked pretty decent I just couldn’t shake the look of Frank and Patrick’s dead stares. Also, boobs don’t jiggle every time a girl walks. Unless you have ENORMOUS boobs and walk like an obese Clydesdale, they don’t jiggle around like a mound of jello. There were also a lot of bugs like characters walking into things or not staying on track which impacted the quest lines. Though I didn’t experience any game breaking bugs, it was enough for me to not want to continue playing. Overall the game looked and played like a creepy Sims mini game.

On That Note

This is a shitty game for shitty people. I did give the game a shot. I got close to sealing the deal with one of the girls, and then stopped. Why? This game is making money off of promoting being a sexual predator to four different women. Poor Madison, Katherine, Amy, and Ashley are taken advantage of the entire game. There IS a fifth woman, because the devs are Super Nice Guys™ and included an LGBT character named Britney. Her story? Her boobies are too big, and she needs a new top to truly enjoy the party. Truly a story for the ages. Amber is also a character but the devs are probably still cooking up a creepy way to pounce on her.

There are some SUPER creepy quests in this game. For example, Madison was the girl who threw the party. Her sister Ashley is also at the party, and Ashley is upset that her sister repeatedly pranks her. Madison’s storyline is you hack her phone with the help of her sister, find her nudes, and then blackmail her into having sex with you. THIS IS NOT OKAY. Under no circumstance is it okay to figure out the password to someone’s phone, find their nudes, send them to yourself, and then blackmail them into trading sexual favors to not release the pictures. First and foremost, you’re a piece of shit person for doing something like that. Two, that is something that is very illegal. You will go to jail for doing that.

Another great example is poor Rachel. Rachel is friends with a porn star, which other girls in the party are offended by. Her quest involves getting the porn stars phone number, giving it to Katherine, and spoofing “dare” texts to Rachel. Those dares include masturbating at the party, and having sex with “the cute guy”.  While Rachel masturbates, you can hide in the closet and watch. ONCE AGAIN, THIS IS NOT OKAY. THIS IS CREEPY AND ILLEGAL. Why is this even a thing?!

I Can’t Believe I Have to Say This

Video games should not introduce or promote these concepts because it is a very real thing that happens to people. And no, it is NOT okay to secretly watch someone masturbate. Once again, not a concept you should be promoting. These are real things that happen to real people, and to make a joke out of it is truly disgusting.

Most of the reviews are about men jacking off to it, or flipping the bird to the “social justice warriors”… And then we have dudes like this:


THIS GAME DOES NOT CONTAIN CONSENSUAL SEX. You MIGHT call Katherine or Stephanie’s story line resulting in consensual sex, but it also requires you to get them extremely drunk (which is noted by a drunkenness meter). Reinforcing the idea that getting someone extremely drunk in order to have sex with them is a bad thing. Blackmail is also not okay, nor is spoofing texts for sexual gain.

A lot of the arguments for this game are also “gore is okay so why not this”. Okay, I’ll give you that… However killing is something that 99% of people know is unacceptable. We are taught from a very young age that hurting or killing people is something to not do. Doing awful things for sex isn’t something that our parents or sex ed classes cover (but should) and something that isn’t a black and white subject for a lot of people. It shouldn’t be an option… Even in a game. I’d much rather see a White Knight Simulator than this. Games like this reinforce some really dangerous ideas that our society toys with. These things shouldn’t be reinforced or normalized.

Don’t Play This

Don’t give these devs your money. Don’t reward them for creating an extremely creepy assault game. If you want to see virtual boobies, I’d suggest downloading a Skyrim mod. Not only is that cheaper than $15, but it doesn’t involve doing illegal things for laughs. Instead you get to see uncensored virtual sex that is consensual. Better yet, find a porn site. Even ask someone on a date. Download Tinder, even! There are much better, cheaper, and ethically sound choices than buying this game.

This game isn’t funny. Blackmail, sexual harassment, and sexual assault isn’t funny. The fact that I have to write all of this and say that it isn’t okay, EVEN IN A GAME, is absolutely insane. Don’t be a creep, people. If you want to woo women go play Stardew Valley or The Sims.

 

House Party Review
Negatives
  • Gameplay
  • Graphics
  • Just gross
0Overall Score
Reader Rating: (6 Votes)
4.9

About The Author

Lexie P.
Editorial/Review Staff

Lexie's love for video games started early when she was rarely seen without her GameBoy, and traded Oreos with the neighbor kid to play his N64. Throughout the years Lexie has developed into a PC gamer, specializing in horror and MOBAs. She has been a game writer for a few years now and has previously worked at PAX West.